The Weird Crap is a weekly publication featuring Alarmingly Strange Stories, Bizarre Columns, Memes and Comics!

Strange Stories

Published Bi-Weekly:

Excerpts of the latest fiction submitted by our visitors…

>>>THE LATEST FICTION

  • White Room
    by Lee Sentes
    -Strange – 2 Pages – The room was white. The walls, ceiling and floor were white. The man sitting at the white table was dressed in white. The door opened. A robot entered. “Your Highness, Emperor Napoleon.” The man looked up and nodded imperially at the mirrored-face. “Warden Friend,” he returned sternly. “I hope you…
  • History of a Hot Sauce: The mysterious Origins of Wassabassco
    by R. Andrew Heidel
    by R. Andrew Heidel and William Morton Our recipe, and Kiki’s lineage, begins in Japan during the waning years of the Edo era when the Tokugawa Shogunate commissioned the Sushi Sensei to discover a wasabi hot enough for the emperor himself. After many years on his dangerous quest, the Sushi Sensei discovered a pure strain…
  • River People
    by Andy Henion
    -Strange – 2 Pages – As far as I can tell there are two types of Tennessee river people and they travel in competing packs and consume washed up fish or this ubiquitous leafy vegetation that I with my northern bearings will only later come to know as kudzu. There are the stoop-shouldered people who…
  • How Roger Hambone Missed His Big Chance
    by Randy Bone
    Roger Hambone despite his last name never learned to hambone. He was hamboneless. But he could eef like nobody’s business. People used to say his name should have been Roger Eef. They called him “Eefin’ Roger Hambone”. When he would eef it sounded like this: Ah ee, ah oh, ah ee, ah oh, [hic], ee,…

Columns

Updated Weekly:

Blogs? Columns? Fiction?
Whatever, here’s some excerpts!

>>>NEW THIS WEEK

  • Fair Warning
    by Spamrider
    I’ll give you fair warning before you read this column: I am about to get all religious and preach up and down the block and speak in tongues and raise hell and raise Cain and call down the fire and the brimstone. If this is the sort of thing that personally offends you I have…
  • The Journey To HR, Part 108!
    by Stephen Johnson
    After all the tape was removed, Star Child Two flew around the room, going faster and faster. When it reached top speed, it headed towards Bob’s exposed buttocks. One minute it was there. After a slurping sound and a scream, it was no longer there. As Bob convulsed and unneeded innards flew from each and…
  • The Squealing of the Pigs, Part 1
    by Bob Senitram
    By Bob SenitramThinking up the nonsense, because nobody asked for this… Looking down at the beautiful woods of Virginia, we see a group of men jogging in matching sweats. As we past by the toughest of the toughest we see one little sad excuse of a man. Somehow, he managed to keep up with the…
  • A Little Song and Dance
    by Spamrider
    A little song… A little dance… A little seltzer down your pants!

Memes

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Comics

Bunch more here!

Random Strange Stories

  • Lock, Stock, and Barrel

    -Strange – 6 Pages – “Get out before I toss you out on your fat ass,” my wife shouted at me during one of her frequent tirades. Smart man that I am, I obeyed. To tell you the truth, when she got in one of her dark moods, it was always best to put some…

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  • And Thanks for the Chicken

    Derik Taylor – 18 Pages – Smelling his armpit, he regrets not taking a shower or at least putting on some deodorant/anti-perspirant. Now he is too close to the door just to turn around and go back upstairs. A minute passes and it becomes crystal that no matter how much cooler he is then this…

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  • Little Affection

    by Andrew Nellis In the box are the few pathetic remnants of her childhood. School year-books, some cheap junk jewelry, all the detritus left behind on the road to adulthood. And her diaries. She has not looked in the box…

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  • Head in the Sand

    Head in the sand by CMR Once upon a time there was an ostrich.  The ostrich had no concerns and was content to while away it’s days with it’s head in the sand.  It would awaken that way in the mornings and drift to sleep that way at night.  During the day it would seek…

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Random Columns From Years Gone By

  • An Unexpected Visit!

    One of the worst things that can happen if, like me, you are in the prostitution/go go dancing profession is the unsightly pimple. I can’t tell you how many times I have been paranoid, while dancing on the stage, that a huge pimple on my ass might decide to pop as I am bending over…

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  • Somebody Stole My Radio

    “Somebody stole my radio.” I found that old chestnut in one of the print versions of TheWeirdcrap! Guess during that time I drank heavily. Seems that I went to a bar and instead of listening to the band, I drank and listened to what I wanted to listen to on a battery operated radio. People…

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  • Your Child Might Be an Idiot If He Golf’s With a Chainsaw

    By Garion Bel   Outside of Saint Garion’s house the wind blows softly, trees sway this way and that, and a neighbor’s child takes an electric chainsaw out to the golf course to practice his game.  Safe on the deck Saint Garion and Ket play Scrabble.   Saint Garion waiting for Ket to make his…

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  • Summer Plans

    And so it came to pass that Saint Garion got engaged. The lord was confused but God saw that it was good. No longer will she be called the enchanting paramour, now she is the bride. This of course means that we’ve been very busy. I find myself spending too much money and without any…

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  • A Pay Raise?

    So, the cast of “Friends” want a huge pay raise. And they are worth it because????? My honest opinion is the show really sucks. I don’t like it, so neither should you. It seems to me that they want more money because they know they have no where else to go. Movie careers? Please. Maybe…

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