The Weird Crap is a weekly publication featuring Alarmingly Strange Stories, Bizarre Columns, Memes and Comics!

Strange Stories

  • Notes on Baby-Sitting
    by Nils Erwin Length: About 6 pages I HAD MY FIRST BABY-SITTING JOB THE OTHER NIGHT. It was tough assignment, 3 kids – 24-hours. The parent was a family friend, Mandy, who seemed to have adopted the absurd notion that I was the man for the job, and moreover, that I should also be paid…
  • Zeep In The City
    -Sci-Fi – 3 Pages – Package runner Alpha One-Six, nicknamed `Zeep’ to endear him to Joe Public and his slobbering troglodyte family, had only been distracted for four hundredths of a second. But in that time, he’d somehow managed to collide with a stationary object; unwittingly knocking out his GPS, comm-link, and access to the…
  • In Green, Remembered
    I awoke knowing the link had been severed.  Tears stung my cheeks as I yanked the blankets off my body and stumbled out of bed, feeling sick and disoriented.                By the time I made it to the bathroom sink in anticipation of throwing up my late night trip to Taco Bell, the feeling had thankfully…
  • Ziontology
    By Mikel Davis “You slimy sack of fish shit!” Deputy Ploggard slammed his hairy fist down onto the grey metal table which separated the two men. His hand landed with such force that it left a fist-shaped dent in the middle of the table. The noise which followed echoed off…

Columns

  • The Journey To HR, Part 124!
    The HR lady and I stopped our conversation to watch. The song was familiar, but it took me a few seconds to figure out what it was. In the meantime, Bob drooled and attempted to dance as his limbs clicked and clacked. Then it hit me. “Are you kidding me?” I asked quite loudly. The…
  • A Halloween Special DOUBLE FEATURE!!! Part 1: The Flood
    By Bob SenitramBecause…aaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh! This is not much of a horror story but this is a true story. About a month ago we had what they call a 100 year rain. Nothing like what they experience on the coast, but it was pretty horrible for us. And “horrible” is almost “horror”. That’s the best I can…
  • The Way I Remembers It
    Before everything gets all crazy and nobody knows what’s real and what’s not anymore, this is the way I remember it all happening. George W. Bush was such a stinking rotten President* that America actually elected a Black guy rather than electing another Republican. This absolutely drove all the latent and blatant racists batshit crazy.…
  • The Journey To HR, Part 123!
    Us, being the fine human beings we were, decided Bob could tag along. We wrestled him from the wolverine’s onslaught, tossed him into a pet carrier and went on our merry way. “ID?” asked the bouncer as we entered to strip club. After we showed him ours and he had commented me on how young…

Memes

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Comics

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Random Strange Stories

  • Witches of Rascar Pablo: Part III

    Witches of Rascar Pablo: Part IIIBy Kristopher LawrenceEdited by Gao Rong Chapter 10: Katatòn Y en cuanto a los que se encuentranbajo la luna de Kataton,Evadan la exaltación,y tengan cuidado con el quetzlcoatlus. And concerning those who find themselvesbeneath the Katatonian moon,Evade the exaltation,and beware the quetzalcoatlus. ∞ : ∞ @# ijđæ, ĦǮ ∞, ЊҨ…

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  • The Odyssey of Joey

    Once upon a time, there lived a very unhappy boy named Joey.”I’m rather unhappy.”  He noted one morning, so he decided to go out and buy himself some drugs. He went wandering down to the market and stumbled across an old man named Stumpy.   He was named this because he had no arms and legs,…

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  • AND THERE WAS LIGHT

    By Chris Harris We as a race, were the essence of eternity. But there was only ever one race, which like time itself was both infinite and finite. All creatures and all time were merely parts of their respective wholes. For as a second might regard a minute as impossible, so does the cell of…

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  • BLIND SIGHT

    -Strange Stories – 21 Pages – In the cigarette smoke there were pictures. And as the smoke rose and dissipated, so the pictures faded and were gone. At the window a view of the old gate in the field unused. Beyond the gate the fields rolled on forever. These were the meadows for the pathways…

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Random Columns From Years Gone By

  • Done Pummelin’!

    Done Pummelin’! by Stephen Johnson I scooped up a chunk vomit from the welcome mat and threw it in Bob’s face. “Yummy,” he said as he forced his way in. “So, what’s this all about?” I asked as a chunk of vomit fell from his face unto the floor. Both Slaits and the kittens ran…

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  • Time in a Beer in a Bottle

    I tried Time in a Beer in a Bottle for the first time today. As an experienced Time Traveller not to mention drunkard it didn’t really do all that much for me to be honest. I can’t really say about the guy I shared it with though. I’m still combing through the history books trying to…

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  • She Went Insane

    The lady of the house went insane watching “Judge Judy” so now we have to go to the Verizon store and switch ownership. Don’t know why she went insane watching that show, but she took a boysenberry pie and threw it against the wall all while levitating about eight feet off the ground. I asked…

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  • No Robots, But Fubbles!

    Robots? Someone is writing about ROBOTS??!! At least when you come here you know you’ll get full-on reality. Got some Fubbles for the cats, but they really didn’t care much about the bubbles floating in the air. Instead, they waited for them to land on the floor where they burst and then they just sat…

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  • Big Lake

    As I write this I am currently sitting in a hotel room in Big Lake, Texas. Never mind what year it is. The name of the hotel is “The Derrick Inn”. I call it “The Derelict Inn”. It isn’t a bad hotel, really. It just has the misfortune of being located in a town that…

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