The Weird Crap is a weekly publication featuring Alarmingly Strange Stories, Bizarre Columns, Memes and Comics!

Strange Stories

Published Bi-Weekly:

Excerpts of the latest fiction submitted by our visitors…

>>>THE LATEST FICTION

  • In Green, Remembered
    by Christopher Nadeau
    I awoke knowing the link had been severed.  Tears stung my cheeks as I yanked the blankets off my body and stumbled out of bed, feeling sick and disoriented.                By the time I made it to the bathroom sink in anticipation of throwing up my late night trip to Taco Bell, the feeling had thankfully…
  • Ziontology
    by Mikel Davis
    By Mikel Davis “You slimy sack of fish shit!” Deputy Ploggard slammed his hairy fist down onto the grey metal table which separated the two men. His hand landed with such force that it left a fist-shaped dent in the middle of the table. The noise which followed echoed off…
  • “The New Job” by Rance Treakle
    by Rance Treakle
    [A Halloween Special from the 2003 Archives] I thought the devil was red and had a tail. I had braced myself for His appearance, His style, even His odor if need be. So what happens when I call Him? He shows up at my door in a three-piece suit, looking like a successful businessman. OK,…
  • THE MICROWAVED CHICKEN HEART
    by Craig Snyder
    The Microwaved Chicken Heart bellowed in triumph as his hideous six-inch fangs tore through the President’s colon. The Chief Executive shrieked in agony; his hopes for a pleasant Wednesday shattered in a few bloody moments. “I don’t believe I’m going to be re-elected,” he whimpered brokenly. The day had dawned so calm and fresh, like…

Columns

Updated Weekly:

Blogs? Columns? Fiction?
Whatever, here’s some excerpts!

>>>NEW THIS WEEK

  • It’s that Time Again!
    by Bob Senitram
    By Bob SenitramNo bacon, just bringing home the nonsense… Well, I’ve been watching all them talking heads on TV and now I guess I got a little somethin’ to say about those midterm elections. To tell the truth, when I was younger, I didn’t think much about Mid-Term elections. I figured, “What difference would it…
  • The New Devil’s Dictionary
    by Spamrider
    Irony: How rust tastes
  • Pillbug Zen
    by Spamrider
    Today I saw the tiniest little pillbug I ever seen in my life.  Then suddenly I got this notion.  So I watched.  And I seen something move.  It was just a tiny little speck.  So I kept watching.  And I seen it move again.  So I looked closer.  And sure enough, it was an even…
  • The Journey To HR, Part 120!
    by Stephen Johnson
    “Seriously? This is the way?” I asked. “This IS the way,” Bob replied. “THIS….is the way,” replied the HR lady. So, this I accepted and died I did. Soon after, I opened my eyes. It was quite foggy and I was quite wet from what felt like rain. “Is this the afterlife?” I asked nobody…

Memes

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Comics

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Random Strange Stories

  • Satan and Some Homeless Janitors

    4 Pages The rural town of Descourve was a town with a long, uneventful history. A brief stay as county seat is the closest it ever came to dignification. The glory days, though, were now long gone and the ambassadors and dignitaries never came anymore. The borough, for that’s what it is really classified as,…

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  • The Cheeseburgers of Enlightenment

    Prologue: Billy Billy Johnson was a 14 year-old Caucasian who lived in the quiet, complacent suburb of Middleton, Wisconsin. He was Christian and heterosexual. He wore black Nike sneakers, Gap Jeans, an Abercrombie and Fitch t-shirt, Fruit of the Loom Underpants, and a Mickey Mouse hat. In his right hand he held a plate with…

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  • Karmic Fries

     “Josie and Dhanesh, help me unpack these things,” Steve hollered from the back room. The two walked over. “We were just leaving,” Josie said. “The registers are closed. The store is clean. The garbage is in the dump. Can it wait until tomorrow?” Steve stared at her and cast an impatient sneer. “If it could…

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  • The Tadpole Revolution

    Jimmy K. heard of the eating establishment known as Tadpoles and decided to give it a try one sultry evening in mid-August. The restaurant was in a nondescript part of town, really quite close to an everyman’s suburbian neighborhood. It was an easy place to drive by if you did not know it was there.…

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Random Columns From Years Gone By

  • Still More Words Of Advice

    Never let a cat win a staring contest unless you know exactly what you are doing.

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  • A Million Little Feces

    David Bowie—“Scary Monsters” MoTW—“Scarecrows” HELP!!!! Someone was kind enough to leave me a link for their blog lastweek but, due to some stupidity on my part, the original post with thelink in the comments section was lost. If that person can kindly postthe link again, it will be greatly appreciated. The following is TRUE. I…

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  • The Journey To HR, Part 18!

    Yep. I died. On the inside. Not enough, though. I felt more poo wanting to come out, but since I was upside down, it was working it’s way towards my mouth. I screamed. Then I screamed again. I didn’t want my poo in my mouth! “Hey! Anybody there? I need some help! I don’t want…

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  • The Journey To HR, Part 63!

    The HR lady carried me outside and then dumped me on the ground. She took keys from her purse. She jangled them in front of my face. “Gotta go!” she yelled as she continued the key jangling. “But….what about me?” I asked as the tears and snot started forming again. “DON’T CARE!” she yelled as…

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  • Another Break Because I’m Sick

    Lynyrd Skynyrd—God + Guns MoTW—Nobel Son So here I am, sitting in front of the computer and writing somethingeven though I am sick. Don't know what it is, but this morning I woke up around 3 am shiveringlike a Crackwhore going through withdrawals. Instead of remaining in the relative warmth of my blanketed cocoon, Idecided…

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