The Weird Crap is a weekly publication featuring Alarmingly Strange Stories, Bizarre Columns, Memes and Comics!

Strange Stories

Published Bi-Weekly:

Excerpts of the latest fiction submitted by our visitors…

>>>THE LATEST FICTION

  • History of a Hot Sauce: The mysterious Origins of Wassabassco
    by R. Andrew Heidel
    by R. Andrew Heidel and William Morton Our recipe, and Kiki’s lineage, begins in Japan during the waning years of the Edo era when the Tokugawa Shogunate commissioned the Sushi Sensei to discover a wasabi hot enough for the emperor himself. After many years on his dangerous quest, the Sushi Sensei discovered a pure strain…
  • River People
    by Andy Henion
    -Strange – 2 Pages – As far as I can tell there are two types of Tennessee river people and they travel in competing packs and consume washed up fish or this ubiquitous leafy vegetation that I with my northern bearings will only later come to know as kudzu. There are the stoop-shouldered people who…
  • How Roger Hambone Missed His Big Chance
    by Randy Bone
    Roger Hambone despite his last name never learned to hambone. He was hamboneless. But he could eef like nobody’s business. People used to say his name should have been Roger Eef. They called him “Eefin’ Roger Hambone”. When he would eef it sounded like this: Ah ee, ah oh, ah ee, ah oh, [hic], ee,…
  • DABBLING IN THE DEPTHS OF HER SOUL
    by Evgeniya Seizova
    by Evgeniya Seizova Year by year a beautiful young lady was gazing with Her spiritual eyes in her own destruction… Was she a human being anymore? She stared her tired and too dilated pupils once again in the impassable Darkness trying to find a ray of light. So many impossible efforts. They’ve been crushing and…

Columns

Updated Weekly:

Blogs? Columns? Fiction?
Whatever, here’s some excerpts!

>>>NEW THIS WEEK

  • Time Portal
    by Spamrider
    By the grace of Herman I finally somehow managed to rig up an elementary time portal. I know it doesn’t look like much.  But it’s a start.  And it works. And here’s how it works. (This is going to get complicated, so buckle up and settle in…) That door you see in the picture leads…
  • The Journey To HR, Part 106!
    by Stephen Johnson
    I was in a restaurant. I was asked how many people were in my party. I thought about it for a moment, just knowing I would be the only one in my party but held up two fingers anyway. Henry Winkler walked by. Was it Henry Winkler? I was pretty sure it was. A waiter…
  • The End of the USSA?
    by Bob Senitram
    By Bob SenitramWriting the nonsense because, if I don’t, who will? Once or twice a year, I like to put my comedy hat on the workbench and write about something that’s been bouncing around in my head. This is one of those times. And before anybody starts sending me spelling corrections, the title was not…
  • A World Without Bologna Hats
    by Spamrider
    I met a woman the other day. She said, “Bologna doesn’t curl up into a bologna hat when you cook it anymore.  Tell me, what has become of this world?” “This can’t be true!” I exclaimed, vexed and flabbergasted. “But it is!” she replied.  “But it is!” I decided to investigate for myself.  I marched…

Memes

Click here for the whole batch!

Comics

Bunch more here!

Random Strange Stories

  • The Return Of Mr. Sockforahead

    Strange – 4 Pages – Daniel stood before the mirror in his rumpled suit. It didn’t fit him as well as it used to – he’d lost some weight. He slicked back his thinning dark hair and straightened his clip-on tie. Today was special; today he was free. More importantly, he was cured. He turned…

    Read More…

  • Lunar’s Armor

    Lunar’s Armor by “Link” Phoenix Rebirth, another technology brought to you by the Microsoft Union of companies, and by the technology of the fiftieth century. It costs a whopping, 50,000,000,000 Dollars for a single tube. But such a tube can be reused thousands of times; it is humanity’s current key to immortality. Once a tube…

    Read More…

  • The Adventure of Cascadilla and Perkchip

    Chapter 1 I’m sorry,” said Shantulopukobeebee, “but I am no longer the man you want to marry.”Cascadilla gently placed the half-eaten chicken nugget on the Louis 20th solid silver gold oblong plate. A single tear formed in the corner of her left eye. Don’t you love me anymore?” she managed to belch out.She picked up…

    Read More…

  • Satan and Some Homeless Janitors

    4 Pages The rural town of Descourve was a town with a long, uneventful history. A brief stay as county seat is the closest it ever came to dignification. The glory days, though, were now long gone and the ambassadors and dignitaries never came anymore. The borough, for that’s what it is really classified as,…

    Read More…

Random Columns From Years Gone By

  • A Touching Email…

    I received a lovely email from Phil that is so touching: “hey melissa, you kin cum live with me sweety i’ll give you a spot right between me my sister and my mom and the sheep, and don’t you worry about the smell , the sheep’ll just have to get used to it ! love…

    Read More….

  • The Winter Roadtrip 2023

    After a nice hard winter, the ol’ lady decided that a winter road trip would be fun. She had some out of state work, so we decided to pack up and head to beautiful-sunny Minneapolis where the grass is greener, and kids are all above average. On the morning to leave, we were greeted with…

    Read More….

  • 2007 New Years Resolution

    Jon Oliva’s Pain—Maniacal Renderings MoTW—The Descent Wow! Another year under our belts which means that the sun is another year closer to slamming into the earth, killing whatever lifeform happens to be inhabiting this planet at that time. Makes me wonder why I didn’t go out and drink till I almost passed out this past…

    Read More….

  • I’m NOT Apologising

    Queen + Paul Rodgers—The Cosmos Rocks MoTW—Blood Feast In the immortal word from "Iron Eagle 2": DAMMIT!! I was all set to go this past Tuesday with my one-of-a-kind live nudeelection day coverage. I had showered and was sitting in front of thecomputer stark naked when I noticed that the "Live Broadcast" link onthis here…

    Read More….

  • Mommy Issues

    Dear Bel, I am 45 and recently my mother moved in with us. Life isn’t fair Bel, we spend all of our extra money to buy food and diapers for this woman and she can’t bring herself to lift a finger around the house. And another thing, she is a bus of a woman, when…

    Read More….

What Is All This Crap?