The Weird Crap is a weekly publication featuring Alarmingly Strange Stories, Bizarre Columns, Memes and Comics!

Strange Stories

Published Bi-Weekly:

Excerpts of the latest fiction submitted by our visitors…

>>>THE LATEST FICTION

  • White Room
    by Lee Sentes
    -Strange – 2 Pages – The room was white. The walls, ceiling and floor were white. The man sitting at the white table was dressed in white. The door opened. A robot entered. “Your Highness, Emperor Napoleon.” The man looked up and nodded imperially at the mirrored-face. “Warden Friend,” he returned sternly. “I hope you…
  • History of a Hot Sauce: The mysterious Origins of Wassabassco
    by R. Andrew Heidel
    by R. Andrew Heidel and William Morton Our recipe, and Kiki’s lineage, begins in Japan during the waning years of the Edo era when the Tokugawa Shogunate commissioned the Sushi Sensei to discover a wasabi hot enough for the emperor himself. After many years on his dangerous quest, the Sushi Sensei discovered a pure strain…
  • River People
    by Andy Henion
    -Strange – 2 Pages – As far as I can tell there are two types of Tennessee river people and they travel in competing packs and consume washed up fish or this ubiquitous leafy vegetation that I with my northern bearings will only later come to know as kudzu. There are the stoop-shouldered people who…
  • How Roger Hambone Missed His Big Chance
    by Randy Bone
    Roger Hambone despite his last name never learned to hambone. He was hamboneless. But he could eef like nobody’s business. People used to say his name should have been Roger Eef. They called him “Eefin’ Roger Hambone”. When he would eef it sounded like this: Ah ee, ah oh, ah ee, ah oh, [hic], ee,…

Columns

Updated Weekly:

Blogs? Columns? Fiction?
Whatever, here’s some excerpts!

>>>NEW THIS WEEK

  • So I Guess I Can Talk About This Now
    by Spamrider
    [Editor’s Note: I found this weeks Spamrider column in an unopened box of Count Chocula. What I mean is I opened the box and there it was. My wife had just brought it home for me from the grocery store and just in case you’re thinking there was some fishy business there were witnesses the…
  • The Journey To HR, Part 109!
    by Stephen Johnson
    Two of the burly men left the room. The rest of us milled around aimlessly, sometimes stepping on Bob’s lifeless body, sometimes not. After a bit, the two burly men came back with a large vat. They took off the cover and threw it to the side. I went over to the vat and peered…
  • The Squealing of the Pigs, Part 3
    by Bob Senitram
    By Bob SenitramThinking up the nonsense, ’cause I got nothin’ else to do… Bob makes his flight to Huston and enters the infamous prison and approaches the first man he see’s. “Excuse me, have you seen the warden?” “I am the warden.” “Excellent, could you point me in your direction?” Puzzled, the warden points to…
  • The New Devil’s Dictionary
    by Spamrider
    Assassin (n): The only words with two asses.

Memes

Click here for the whole batch!

Comics

Bunch more here!

Random Strange Stories

  • The Sock Puppet That Came In From The Cold (Part 2)

    9 Pages Part 2 of 3: Elsewhere in the city that night, a party was being held: in the police station of all places. But not everyone attending was filled with Christmas cheer. Officer Peter Gumption had rather more worrisome thoughts on his mind. He sat nursing them limply on the couch. An attractive blonde…

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  • Communion

    Communion, by Dan Ericsson There was nothing. Then there was Irving. The booth which he inhabited had not existed until he sat there. When he left, so would the table, the upholstered benches and the dessert advertisement. It would slide from reality to his memory, trapped until someone else sat there. The same went for…

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  • Takin ah Smoke Break

    by Drake Knight Note from Editor: This may seem a bit dated in today’s world, but it was written in 2005. I was at work, while taking my smoke break, and what was really odd about that is the fact that I don’t smoke. But, there I was, in the smoker’s lounge, puffin’ on a…

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  • Interfacing

    “What the hell are you doing?” I asked him. “Interfacing,” he said. “With your shirt?” “This shirt is a microfiber weave quantum computer,” he replied as he kept tapping imaginary keys on the side of his stomach. “All my garments are computers. So is everything in this room.” I thought about it a minute and…

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Random Columns From Years Gone By

  • The Daring Exploits of Harry Smith,

    Harry Smith looked at the bridge in front of him, swaying to and fro in the gusty breeze. He had traveled for three days straight and now this bridge was the only obstacle with him being reunited with his truest of loves- Hilda Davenport. He had met Hilda three months ago upon an ivory expedition,…

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  • And Yet

    The Lord, unhappy that I have not posted to this blog in such a long time has taken to shitting on my bed. In response I’ve erected a wooden cross and mounted it on my nightstand. Not in remembrance of HIM but as a warning, “Shit on this bed again and you’ll get far worse…

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  • How Much Vomit Would A Person Vomit If A…Oh Forget It!

    Yoyo asks:If I vomit a lot will I eventually vomit up my own poo? And if so, where will it end? This had to be scientifically tested. I got the idea in my head of how to do this, I would be the placebo and Jerome would be the test subject. Jerome didn’t want to…

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  • Phone Call

    Actual phone conversation from 6/14/21: “You need to get a Facebook account.” “Why?” “Research says we need to hit social media in order to make money.” “Wait…..we make money?” “Well…….” “I’m not comfortable with Facebook or any social media. I’m just trying that influencing thing. You know, for free stuff.” “You’re what?” “Nothing.” (something mumbled…

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  • This Might Be For Real

    Well, it’s been a long time since this has been updated. The last time was August of 2016 so you would think that something serious was going on in my life. You might also think that something serious was going on in that other guy’s life, but that’s highly doubtful. I guess we’re back and…

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