The Weird Crap is a weekly publication featuring Alarmingly Strange Stories, Bizarre Columns, Memes and Comics!

Strange Stories

Published Bi-Weekly:

Excerpts of the latest fiction submitted by our visitors…

>>>THE LATEST FICTION

  • Notes on Baby-Sitting
    by Nils Erwin
    by Nils Erwin Length: About 6 pages I HAD MY FIRST BABY-SITTING JOB THE OTHER NIGHT. It was tough assignment, 3 kids – 24-hours. The parent was a family friend, Mandy, who seemed to have adopted the absurd notion that I was the man for the job, and moreover, that I should also be paid…
  • Zeep In The City
    by Joshua Blanc
    -Sci-Fi – 3 Pages – Package runner Alpha One-Six, nicknamed `Zeep’ to endear him to Joe Public and his slobbering troglodyte family, had only been distracted for four hundredths of a second. But in that time, he’d somehow managed to collide with a stationary object; unwittingly knocking out his GPS, comm-link, and access to the…
  • In Green, Remembered
    by Christopher Nadeau
    I awoke knowing the link had been severed.  Tears stung my cheeks as I yanked the blankets off my body and stumbled out of bed, feeling sick and disoriented.                By the time I made it to the bathroom sink in anticipation of throwing up my late night trip to Taco Bell, the feeling had thankfully…
  • Ziontology
    by Mikel Davis
    By Mikel Davis “You slimy sack of fish shit!” Deputy Ploggard slammed his hairy fist down onto the grey metal table which separated the two men. His hand landed with such force that it left a fist-shaped dent in the middle of the table. The noise which followed echoed off…

Columns

Updated Weekly:

Blogs? Columns? Fiction?
Whatever, here’s some excerpts!

>>>NEW THIS WEEK

  • National Brotherhood Week
    by Spamrider
    The Spamrider is totally phoning it in and heading for the hills this week, folks.
  • The Journey To HR, Part 124!
    by Stephen Johnson
    The HR lady and I stopped our conversation to watch. The song was familiar, but it took me a few seconds to figure out what it was. In the meantime, Bob drooled and attempted to dance as his limbs clicked and clacked. Then it hit me. “Are you kidding me?” I asked quite loudly. The…
  • A Halloween Special DOUBLE FEATURE!!!
    by Bob Senitram
    Part 1: The Flood By Bob SenitramBecause…aaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh! This is not much of a horror story but this is a true story. About a month ago we had what they call a 100 year rain. Nothing like what they experience on the coast, but it was pretty horrible for us. And “horrible” is almost “horror”. That’s…
  • The Way I Remembers It
    by Spamrider
    Before everything gets all crazy and nobody knows what’s real and what’s not anymore, this is the way I remember it all happening. George W. Bush was such a stinking rotten President* that America actually elected a Black guy rather than electing another Republican. This absolutely drove all the latent and blatant racists batshit crazy.…

Memes

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Comics

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Random Strange Stories

  • DABBLING IN THE DEPTHS OF HER SOUL

    by Evgeniya Seizova Year by year a beautiful young lady was gazing with Her spiritual eyes in her own destruction… Was she a human being anymore? She stared her tired and too dilated pupils once again in the impassable Darkness trying to find a ray of light. So many impossible efforts. They’ve been crushing and…

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  • Binkle Bunny in Super Electronic

    It was a lovely day and the Cummy Todge was brimming with people. Some of these people were regulars who were somewhat used to the usual insanity of the place. Most of them however were the unfortunate victims of chance, blissfully unaware that they were in danger of leaving the establishment gibbering like halfwits. Ned…

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  • You can call me Al

    by Douglas L Rains -Sci-Fi – 14 Pages – Chapter 1 Johnny Meyers was hurrying home from school and he was going to be in trouble. He had to stay in detention after his last 8th grade class because he had made a ‘not so smart’ remark to one of his teachers. He was only…

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  • How Roger Hambone Missed His Big Chance

    Roger Hambone despite his last name never learned to hambone. He was hamboneless. But he could eef like nobody’s business. People used to say his name should have been Roger Eef. They called him “Eefin’ Roger Hambone”. When he would eef it sounded like this: Ah ee, ah oh, ah ee, ah oh, [hic], ee,…

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Random Columns From Years Gone By

  • B Batteries are Badder: Bart Blue

    B Batteries…where are they? This weeks column is finishing up from last week’s question. Feel free to “Ask Bob” a question.-He has a degree in SCIENCE!- Last week I was asked: “Why are there no B batteries?” But before we get into that, I would like to point out some of my favorite Lunatic Ravings…

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  • The New Devil’s Dictionary

    Optimistic:  a.) Tending to choose the brighter outlook over the dimmer outlook.  Also, tending to fabricate and maintain the brighter outlook even when such an outlook no longer is tenable. b.) Delusional “Is the glass half-full or half-empty?” she asked.“Are you pouring or drinking?” I inquired.

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  • A Selection of Poems from the Pen of P.S.Gifford

    As I Sit ‘Ere. As I sit ‘ere and try and type-all the words jigging in me ‘ead.I hope the words I finally say, are the words I wanted said… I hope that I can write them right,and make meself so clear.And you understand-as I planned,and hear what I want you to hear. I hope…

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  • The Best of Melissa…

    Note from the Editor: Our writers vowed to go on strike after the real writers were done with their strike. This makes no sense, and we have no idea why they decided to do this. But because of the “strike” we are forced to post the equivalent to a re-run, As Seen on TV! So,…

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  • Your Child Might Be an Idiot If He Golf’s With a Chainsaw

    By Garion Bel   Outside of Saint Garion’s house the wind blows softly, trees sway this way and that, and a neighbor’s child takes an electric chainsaw out to the golf course to practice his game.  Safe on the deck Saint Garion and Ket play Scrabble.   Saint Garion waiting for Ket to make his…

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