Tales of Constant, Unrelenting Insanity
November 6, 200416 Pages vol. I Larry was in a miserable mood as he left the slaughterhouse at 5:00 PM after working an 8 ½ hour-shift, then being laid off. It was like the world had stabbed him in the back, and opened up a wound where…
The whole story...
Going bananas
August 24, 2005"I'm afraid, Mr. Smith, that your monkey has cancer," the vet informed me. "Cancer?" I echoed. "Poor CoCo." Poor Coco nothing. Poor me was more like it. The damn baboon was a pain in the ass from the get go. And I'd trained my fair…
The whole story...
The Goddam Ginsu Knife
November 1, 2023He never liked the Ginsu Knife. It kept looking at him. Actually, it was his own reflected image in the knife that would stare back at him as he crept warily by, but the knife had a strange way of twisting and distorting the reflection…
The whole story...
At The Gates
May 15, 20012 Pages A crowd was gathered outside the city. People milled about aimlessly, bumping into each other as often as they were bumped into. A feeling of quiet panic and frustration trickled through, subsiding once, swelling again. The only thing that kept an epidemic in…
The whole story...
The Sallow Tallow Man
December 15, 2025The Sallow Tallow Man by Joshua Blanc Oliver had just opened up shop for the morning, and was starting up his various processes in anticipation of another lucrative day. He lit a lamp, which cast flickering light onto dim and greasy surfaces. Every morning there…
The whole story...
The Forbidden Time Zone: Part 28
May 23, 2025The silence broke when Cindy lowered her gaze to the table. Slowly, deliberately, she placed both palms down, then pushed herself up without looking at Bob. Her eyes rose last, calm and unreadable. In one smooth motion, she reached under her blouse, drew a sleek,…
I'm interested, I'll read more...
Mars Needs Women
September 21, 2025So you’ve probably heard about the Chick Shit situation by now. We have nobody to write it. Bob has now driven off every woman who was ever associated with this website. Actually I just made that up, because it’s fun to make fun of Bob…
I'm interested, I'll read more...
We Have Too Many Ladders
August 27, 2022As I sat in garage pondering life and other stuff, I noticed that we have too many ladders. We once had four. Two small ones and two large ones. I gave away one of the small ones which leaves us with three, but that's still…
I'm interested, I'll read more...
Strange Dreams
May 12, 2023In my younger days I wasn't as clean cut and conservative as I am today. So after a lifetime abusing drugs and alcohol, my brain is like a block of Swiss cheese. As you can imagine, this gives my subconscious plenty of space to roam…
I'm interested, I'll read more...
Twice Divorced…
September 4, 2001Dear Bel: I am a 35-year-old, twice-divorced male with four wonderful kids. My track record with marriage hasn't been terrific, so now I am very careful about finding the right woman.Last year, I became involved with "Lucy." She has been supportive and wonderful to me.…
I'm interested, I'll read more...
The Latest Weirdcrap News for the Uninformed!
April 21, 2024Stop by here for the recent additions, announcements, news, and anything else that’s crawling out of my a**, or should I say, the strange and surreal corners of our website. The weird crap never stops…
Read More
What Are We? A Definitive Explanation of TheWeirdcrap.com
February 27, 2024You get a nice library of strange stories and weird fiction that's been accumulating since 2000. You also get access to Short Attention Span Stuff; comics, memes, and jokes. Browse around, read a story or…
Read More