In The Days Leading Up To
March 7, 20005 pages I was once told that life is a book that can never be reread. Once you've turned the page, all you can do is remember. You have to hope that someone else is reading the same book, so you can reminisce. We are,…
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I Want My Alien Back!
July 26, 2008Sci-Fi - 9 Pages "He's not in Area 51? What do you mean he's not in Area 51?" said Lou Diamond's wife. "Then you better go after him." "But, honey, I-" "No!" she insisted angrily, her finger outstretched and pointing at the front door. "No…
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Me and Myself and My Son: A Shitty Story
January 21, 2009A man was defecating on my England hotel room floor as I walked in. He looked over and squinted at the new light surrounding me from the hallway. I shut the door and said,” The bathrooms over there, buddy.” It was All Hallows Evening and…
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LIFE FACTORY
August 15, 2010LIFE FACTORY Here comes one. I wonder what he’s thinking about. He’s got to be around twenty-seven I suppose and the smart casual dress gives a hint of lower clerical day duties. As he approached I got ready to merge with him and soon I’d…
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The Sock Puppet That Came In From The Cold (Part 3)
December 27, 20107 Pages Part 3 of 3: Sally drove her Volkswagen Golf through what had now become a blizzard. Snow fell relentlessly, covering the streets and making visibility downright invisible. To make matters worse, the streets were icy beneath the snow. The small car treated corners…
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Its Not A Popularity Contest!
July 24, 2000Johnny Vincent from El Cerrito, CA, asks . "Hey Bob, how can I become as popular as You? A: . Interesting. Just the other day I was workin' on my car "jammin'" to "Picking up the Pieces" by the Average White Band (AWB), when my wife (A weird hippy-chick…
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The New Devil’s Dictionary
January 5, 2025The New Devil's Dictionary by Spamrider of the Apocalypse. Asshole: One who prides himself upon subjugating and treating others with derision and disdain. A sub-category of energy vampire who specifically feeds off of agitation, anger, and hatred. Bitch (n): A female asshole.
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Mr. Goatee And Testicle Shopping
March 28, 2009Chicago---XXXII: Stone Of SisyphusMoTW---There Will Be BloodThere's something going on in Bob's land, something I need to knowabout. It's something about Stephen and how he can't read. Is the Stephen he'sreferring to actually me? I don't know. He's claimed it's what's comingnext on his last…
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For Those Allergic To People
March 30, 2025Soylent Green is made out of people. Soylent Red is made out of squirrels. Soylent Blue is made out of possum. Soylent Yellow is made out of toads. Soylent Magenta is made out of placenta. Soylent Pink is made out of chicken byproducts. Soylent Teal…
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I finally had my first show!!!
August 21, 2024Of course, the first show didn't go off without a hitch, but I performed to the best of my ability, and I think the people in the audience were very appreciative. I was scared that the crowd wold be like the crowds in the go…
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The Latest Weirdcrap News for the Uninformed!
April 21, 2024Stop by here for the recent additions, announcements, news, and anything else that’s crawling out of my a**, or should I say, the strange and surreal corners of our website. The weird crap never stops…
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What Are We? A Definitive Explanation of TheWeirdcrap.com
February 27, 2024You get a nice library of strange stories and weird fiction that's been accumulating since 2000. You also get access to Short Attention Span Stuff; comics, memes, and jokes. Browse around, read a story or…
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