The Weird Crap is a weekly publication featuring Alarmingly Strange Stories, Bizarre Columns, Memes and Comics!

Strange Stories

Published Bi-Weekly:

Excerpts of the latest fiction submitted by our visitors…

>>>THE LATEST FICTION

  • White Room
    by Lee Sentes
    -Strange – 2 Pages – The room was white. The walls, ceiling and floor were white. The man sitting at the white table was dressed in white. The door opened. A robot entered. “Your Highness, Emperor Napoleon.” The man looked up and nodded imperially at the mirrored-face. “Warden Friend,” he returned sternly. “I hope you…
  • History of a Hot Sauce: The mysterious Origins of Wassabassco
    by R. Andrew Heidel
    by R. Andrew Heidel and William Morton Our recipe, and Kiki’s lineage, begins in Japan during the waning years of the Edo era when the Tokugawa Shogunate commissioned the Sushi Sensei to discover a wasabi hot enough for the emperor himself. After many years on his dangerous quest, the Sushi Sensei discovered a pure strain…
  • River People
    by Andy Henion
    -Strange – 2 Pages – As far as I can tell there are two types of Tennessee river people and they travel in competing packs and consume washed up fish or this ubiquitous leafy vegetation that I with my northern bearings will only later come to know as kudzu. There are the stoop-shouldered people who…
  • How Roger Hambone Missed His Big Chance
    by Randy Bone
    Roger Hambone despite his last name never learned to hambone. He was hamboneless. But he could eef like nobody’s business. People used to say his name should have been Roger Eef. They called him “Eefin’ Roger Hambone”. When he would eef it sounded like this: Ah ee, ah oh, ah ee, ah oh, [hic], ee,…

Columns

Updated Weekly:

Blogs? Columns? Fiction?
Whatever, here’s some excerpts!

>>>NEW THIS WEEK

  • A Small Birthday Break
    by Stephen Johnson
    This country has been around for 250 years. I’ve been alive around 39% of that. I obviously have no life, but have maybe seen some stuff. Like “Scanners”. A head blows up. Boom. Happy Birthday America????
  • The Squealing of the Pigs, Part 2
    by Bob Senitram
    By Bob Senitram“Thinking up the nonsense, and then some…” Before we continue on our scheduled programming…HAPPY 250TH BIRTHDAY USA!!!! We now resume regular programming. A few days later, the trainer’s on the phone with Dr. Benson. The man in charge of psychology…and shit. “I can’t stress this enough, we need someone expendable.” “We tried expanding…
  • Fair Warning
    by Spamrider
    I’ll give you fair warning before you read this column: I am about to get all religious and preach up and down the block and speak in tongues and raise hell and raise Cain and call down the fire and the brimstone. If this is the sort of thing that personally offends you I have…
  • The Journey To HR, Part 108!
    by Stephen Johnson
    After all the tape was removed, Star Child Two flew around the room, going faster and faster. When it reached top speed, it headed towards Bob’s exposed buttocks. One minute it was there. After a slurping sound and a scream, it was no longer there. As Bob convulsed and unneeded innards flew from each and…

Memes

Click here for the whole batch!

Comics

Bunch more here!

Random Strange Stories

  • The Frogman

    6 Pages “I am the frogman!” he gurgled as chunks of vomit spewed from his mouth. Thinking they were newly hatched eggs he scooped them up, rushed to the toilet and threw them in. “If only I could get my hands on a burrito,” he thought. Slowly, the Frogman staggered into the kitchen and checked…

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  • Lunar’s Armor

    Lunar’s Armor by “Link” Phoenix Rebirth, another technology brought to you by the Microsoft Union of companies, and by the technology of the fiftieth century. It costs a whopping, 50,000,000,000 Dollars for a single tube. But such a tube can be reused thousands of times; it is humanity’s current key to immortality. Once a tube…

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  • The Boy Who Couldn’t Recycle

    -Humor – 1 Page And now the story of Buildrock Mane. Buildrock Mane was a little boy with a long name. He could run really fast. He ran as fast as most people can breathe, or as fast as a fish can swim in a tank of Berrysaurus Rex Kool-Aid. He loved to run. Zipping…

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  • SONGS FROM THE WOOD

    SONGS FROM THE WOOD Strange – 20 Pages – Despite years of studies, nobody had cracked the code. Many individuals and groups, looking at the puzzle from a multitude of different angles, had all failed to solve the riddle. Birdsong it seemed might never give up its secrets.     Thomas Mills was one such researcher.…

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Random Columns From Years Gone By

  • Ask Bob is now an AWARD WINNING COLUMN!!!

    I would like to proudly announce the management of TheWeirdcrap.com has awarded the Ask Bob column a prestigious award. I am now the recipient of the “Flying Fickle Finger of Fate” Award. It was explained to me that the owners wanted to give me “The Finger” in a family friendly way…so this was it. Sure,…

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  • Time Haiku #68

    Do not speak of timeTime is but an illusionI strap to my wrist

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  • Thou Shall Not Worship Those That Wear Bib Overalls

    Paul Gilbert & Freddie Nelson—United States MoTW—This Is Not A Test It's a good thing Bob posts his shit on Sundays since it gives me 5-6days to let the anger die down so I can respond with a clear and mellowconscience. Yes, I'm still locked in the basement since someone has not acceptedBiViD (not TiVO…

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  • Bunnies

    I got a shot recently. For…….something. After the shot, I was told to sit down on THE bench for 15 minutes, just to make sure I was going to be ok. So I did. And then came the bunnies. Lots and lots of bunnies. With fangs. Of course they started attacking the customers at that…

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  • The Journey To HR, Part 36!

    “Yes. Yes he does,” I said as I eyed his prone body. I grabbed my handy tape measure and measured him with that same tape measure I just happened to have, from one of the many pockets I also just happened to have. “Yes, definitely taller,” I said. Bob spryly leapt to his feet as…

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