|
|
 |
| Alarmingly Strange Stories |
|
|
Thousands of Fleeing Japanese |
|
| . Mr. Hosaka and his secretary hurried to the 2nd floor and flung open the door to the room where the small dark man wrote. "Mr. Hijiro! You must stop immediately! You are causing tremendous harm! The small dark man, identified as Mr. Hijiro, obediently put down his pen, "Hai," he said. Godzilla took out a roll of bills and paid the screaming waiter, who, fatigued, merely whimpered and wished them a pleasant evening. The monsters strolled off down the street, gazing at the beautiful sunset, which, though still lovely, had become somewhat obscured by hordes of tiny black helicopters and columns of thick, grey smoke. Mothra sighed. "We really ought to be having tea in some secluded garden," he said. "Right. Let's do it!" Godzilla was eager to set off at once; he loved tea gardens. Rhodan hesitated. "I've got my shopping to do…" "Just think how much better your shopping experience will be after you've contemplated the ending of this perfect day," Godzilla said. Rhodan was trapped by the logic and symmetry of Godzilla's words; so the three friends made their way to a remote garden they knew of which contained a shimmering pool overhung with willows, and a view of the distant sea. Upon reaching the garden, they encountered Gamera and the three Space Women, who agreed to join them. The garden was occupied by many Japanese quietly sipping tea. The intrusion of the monsters caused much terror and soiling of underpants. Many rushed to a nearby cliff and flung themselves off, while others searched hurriedly for fresh underpants. Soon however, ritual won out; the monsters were given the best seats, and the Space Women served the tea. Everyone sighed. The sunset was lovely, the tea, exquisite. As darkness fell, the happy party broke up. Rhodan left to do his shopping, and to destroy several small villages. Gamera and the Space Women rose into the air, spinning like crazy, and disappeared behind a nearby mountain where immediately, Giant Space Robots attacked them. Gamera and the Space Women beat them up and jumped on them over and over again, until they cried for their mommies. Many Japanese fled. Godzilla and Mothra slowly made their way back into Tokyo proper, laughing and swatting at the tiny helicopters that swarmed around them like flies. "Life is good," said Godzilla. "Yes," said Mothra. "Life is rich." "Yes." "Life is full." "Yes." "Is that the Deadly Mantis sucking up electricity from Tokyo Light and Power, and giving me the fish eye?" "Yes." "I'll be right back." Godzilla roared. His eyes glittered with hatred. The Mighty Lizard strode forth to confront the mutant insect. "Hey, Douche bag!" He yelled. "How dare you show your face in Tokyo?! This is my city, you freak! You're not even from Monster Island!" The massive insect eyed him coldly and chittered in reply. Slowly, it flexed its huge, clawed limbs and rose into the air, illuminated by spotlights and tracer bullets. Godzilla's challenge shattered the sky. The Mantis dived, slashing with its claws, ripping into Godzilla's skull. Godzilla responded with electric fire, which splashed harmlessly off the insect's body. The Deadly Mantis closed in for the kill. Godzilla belched forth gouts of orange flame which engulfed the Mantis, turning it into a living torch. It shrieked, a sound like tearing metal, and then spiraled into Tokyo Harbor, plunging into the dark waters with a hiss. The fight was over, for now… Mothra fluttered over to his wounded friend. "Are you ok?" "Yea," said Godzilla as he wiped the blood from his bulging eyes. "What a fight! I totally dry-gulched that turd! And if he shows his tiny insect butt again, I'll roast him a new one!" . |
||
|
. Navigation: |
||