Eat Pete
April 20, 2005-Humor - 5 Pages - Mary Beth awoke with a start. "What the fu…," she said, groggily. She looked around and realized immediately that it had been a dream. But what a strange dream it was. Stranger than most, to be sure. Not necessarily a…
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The Do It Yourselfer
April 5, 2006Humor - 4 Pages - "When we finally came to rest, I was spread-eagled over an obese, senile naked lady in a lake of diarrhea.." I'm proud of the fact that I'm self sufficient in the ED. And it irritates the fire out of me…
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Communion
January 13, 2025Communion, by Dan Ericsson There was nothing. Then there was Irving. The booth which he inhabited had not existed until he sat there. When he left, so would the table, the upholstered benches and the dessert advertisement. It would slide from reality to his memory,…
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Underbelly
January 15, 20013 Pages Underbelly Rich pressed his forehead to the rain-streaked glass. His grubby clothes scratched against his skin as the monorail bucked over a siding. The people around him jolted in unison, hanging heavily on plastic handles or bouncing on the cheap, hard seats. Rich…
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Family Secrets
November 9, 2005-Strange - 4 Pages - Lester walked into the wall and kept right on going. Strange as that may sound, it wasn't all that unusual. Lester could walk through anything - walls, doors, trees, sand dunes, hotdog stands, people; you name it, Lester could walk…
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Cold Fingers
December 22, 2008Well I figured that after explaining how all life on Earth started, I needed a little break. Breaks over and again I have absolutely nothing to write about.Last week poor Stephen was called out by a fan and was accused of having the weaker gene…
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A Couple Big Slices
January 22, 2006The Mahavishnu Orchestra---"The Lost Trident Sessions"MoTW---"Teachers"All that follows is as true as Part One.I suppose getting sent to rehab at such a young age would befrightening, but I found that it really wasn't. My roommate, a 35 yearold ex-rodeo clown addicted to smoking dried cow…
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It’s Take Your Kid to Work Day!
January 17, 2024Looks like I made a huge mistake bringing my baby to work. I think there also might be something seriously wrong with it since it's now over 5 feet tall and it's less than a month old. Instead of calling it "it" all the time,…
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Bob’s Top Ten, Pretty-Sure to Work, Pick-up Lines
December 8, 2023This week I present pick-up lines thanks to Jason who asks: "Hey Bob, how do I meet women?" Dear Jason: I really don't know because I've been married for 25 years, so I asked the kid. "It's all online, people don't go out in public…
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My Birthday/Xmas Special
December 24, 2022I interrupt my special 10-part episode of explaining why dogs eat poo to present this special holiday column. You see my birthday falls on the day that writers for TheWeirdcrap.com must submit thier copies for publication, so I asked, "Hey, it's my birthday, can I…
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The Latest Weirdcrap News for the Uninformed!
April 21, 2024Stop by here for the recent additions, announcements, news, and anything else that’s crawling out of my a**, or should I say, the strange and surreal corners of our website. The weird crap never stops…
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What Are We? A Definitive Explanation of TheWeirdcrap.com
February 27, 2024You get a nice library of strange stories and weird fiction that's been accumulating since 2000. You also get access to Short Attention Span Stuff; comics, memes, and jokes. Browse around, read a story or…
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