| Saturday, July 01, 2006 One Little Plan Broken Into Pieces Dragonforce---"Sonic Firestorm" MoTW---"The Hills Have Eyes (2006)" When I was done shitting. showering and eating breakfast, I went back to my room, pulled Mrs Beasley from the closet and sat her on the bed. "Okay, here's the plan. When everyone's asleep and I knock three times on my door, I want you to sneak into my parents room and behead them. When you're done with that, you then will sneak downstairs and behead my brother. Oh yeah, behead the poodle too since that little shit hates me for some reason." No response from Mrs Beasley. I picked her up and shook her figuring she might still be in shock from the monkey sex, but I got nothing but a blank stare from her glassy eyes. I put my ear to her head and heard nothing. No humming motor, no sound of the ocean, nothing. Just the sound a normal doll's head makes, which is the sound of nothingness. Figuring the batteries had died, I popped off her skull and removed the motor. At this moment my brother walked in and started laughing. "Playing with dolls now? First monkeys and now dolls. Incredible " "Yeah, think what you want to think," I said as I pulled a couple of new batteries from my desk drawer. "But you've gotta check this shit out." "Whatever," he said as I put the new batteries into the motor and shoved it back into Mrs Beasley's head. "I just came by to see if you've seen my monkey." I jammed the skull back on and set the doll on the floor. She blinked a couple times and then went back to acting like a normal doll. "Nope, no monkey here," I said not wanting to explain what the monkey had been doing a short time before. "Well, if I find that you've......" "KILL HIM MRS BEASLEY! KILLLLLLLL HIMMMMM!" I screamed as I pointed at my brother. She immediately came to life and got to her feet. As my brother watched with a shocked look on his face, she walked a bit unsteadily over to him and started tearing at his pants with her tiny hands. Since her fingers weren't separated, she didn't do too much damage. As a matter of fact the only damage she might have done was put a miniscule wrinkle on his pants that the naked eye couldn't see. "Cute," my brother said as he kicked the doll and, as she sailed through the air, left my room. She smacked against the wall and slowly slid down until she hit the floor while I sat down on the bed thinking about how I obviously needed a new plan. "I can't have any more tea because my cup is full," she said. COMING NEXT: Back to square one |
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