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Maculate Conception - 02/12/03
By Bel Garion
Published each Tuesday

Dear Bel,

My wife and I have been married now for a little over two years. For all of this time we have been happy; we have satisfactory jobs and good friends. In fact, I was recently promoted and given a modest increase in salary. It seems however that things have taken a turn for the worse. There has been a sudden and marked decline in my wife's mental acuity. I first thought something was wrong when she began to cook only for herself. She was not angry, and apologized when I jokingly asked if she were eating alone these days. That night I turned in before her and woke later in the night to find her sleeping on the floor. I woke her and helped her to bed. The next day, today, I found her on the floor in the living room covered in her own urine. She hadn't slept and had to be prompted before she would bathe. What has happened to her Bel? Has she been possessed?


Dear Larry,

I must say that I was very confused by your message. After I read it, I didn't believe it. But curiosity got the better of me and I reached out to touch the minds of you and your dear wife. In you I found the ordered, albeit undisciplined mind of an obnoxious alcoholic computer dork. I respect that. In your wife I found lots of little status bars that said
things like "FUN", "COMFORT", and "HYGIENE". I think your wife has played enough of "THE SIMS". Do whatever you can to make her stop and she should be back to normal within a few days. Hope this helps.


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