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.38 Special---"Drivetrain'
Here's part 4. Read it if you must.
It didn't take long for the first vixen to die. I have no idea why someone would do it since it really makes no
sense, but someone had a really sick sense of humor and decided to lay some very large bear traps along our escape
route and nubile chick #1 wasn't paying enough attention and found herself in a predicament she could only dream
about.
When the bear trap snapped shut on her mid torso, I thought she might have a chance to live as long as I had enough
peroxide and bandages. However, when I saw that one half of her body was to the left with the other half about
15 feet to the right, I knew that this was a bleeder beyond all bleeders and that there was little to no hope.
This didn't stop me from trying though. I dragged the bottom half of her body over to the top half and matched
them up the best I could and with one flick of my trusty Bic I was ready to cauterize.
Of course it wasn't that easy because that would be a little too far-fetched. People must understand that extreme
heat hurts and she put up quite a struggle as I tried my best to melt one side of her body to the other side so
I must admit that when I was done, she wasn't exactlystreamlined.
About three inches of her bottom part stuck out on the left side which means that about three inches of her top
part stuck out on the right side. This would not do so I thought that maybe I could pull he apart again and start
fresh. Her two friends didn't seem too pleased with this course of action so I decided to put her out of my misery
by stomping repeatedly on her head until I was assured that there was no way she could rise from the dead.
A little sidenote here: Since she was already dead, or close to it, what I did was humane. I found no pleasure
in doing what I did. It was kind of relaxing but that's an issue I might need to check into.)
The two remaining women cried for a bit and then we decided that it would be in our best interest to move on since
cannibals get kind of crazy when you kill one of their own.
Of course it wasn't going to be that easy since nubile chick #2 was struck down less than a hundred yards from
chick #1 when the largest king cobra I have ever seen jumped from a banana tree and sank it's fangs into one of
her inner thighs.
The snake remained attached to her inner thigh for an hour or two before becoming bored and releasing it's grip.
I immediately sprung into action and ordered nubile chick #3 to suck the venom out since that's what I learned
from the Scout guide and porno movies.
#3 started sucking and nibbling at the bite which caused #2 to moan. Getting caught up in the life saving technique
spread out before me, I screamed, "More tongue, less teeth!"
Soon #2 was dead. For some reason I felt very relaxed and lit up a cigarette as #3 cried over her latest lost friend.
When she was done crying she came over to me for a hug, but I declined and reminded her that we really needed to
move on.
After running for a couple of minutes we came upon a convenience store that seemed to be doing a fairly brisk business.
I decided that we should stop so that I could stock up on some supplies but not for too long since I still had
a sneaky suspicion that the cannibals wouldn't give up too easily.
We loaded ourselves up with a few bottles of water, a pack of cigarettes, seven Slim Jims and a tube of lipstick
(for her) and after a relaxing visit to the restroom I was ready to continue the journey.
As soon as we exited the store #3 screamed and pointed ahead. I looked and saw what caused her to scream which
caused me to yell:
"Shit! We're........."
End of part 4
Here is the sneak peek at part 5.
".................fucked!"
COMING
NEXT: Swimming in the ear
Email Stephen!
snide_remarks@theweirdcrap.com |
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