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Lunatic Ravings!
I don't watch any reality tv programming because I feel that those that participate are morons. But my feelings might change with a new reality series from Fox debuting in January. From what I understand a bunch of stupid women were duped into believing a guy that makes only $19,000.00 a year is a multi-millionaire. I guess this show will prove that love is blind and not every woman is out for money. Kind of stupid if you ask me since they agreed to be on a program with a supposed millionaire so they actually were interested in the money PLUS they will get massive amounts of exposure and probably make some money after the show is over by going on talk shows so I will hold firmly in my belief that most women are only interested in money. Actually the show sounds funny in principle. It seems that some of the women who appear on this show will get their comeuppance, but I have a feeling that the show isn't going to be as evil as it should be. I have an idea along the lines of "Big Brother". We get a bunch of different types of people to live together in a strange place. But, instead of having them live in a nice house, we blindfold them and drop them off at a prison populated with murderers and rapists and see how well and how long they can get along with their new roomies before they're shanked or made into someone's bitch. A ratings powerhouse!! Or, we can send some homeowner couple away on a vacation and then have some company come over and demolish the house and build a grocery store or a porn shop. Imagine the hilarity when the couple coms back from the Bahamas to find a shelf full of dildos of every color, shape and size imaginable greet them when they walk through what used to be their front door. A ratings blockbuster. How about having a camera crew follow a crack addicted whore as she turns tricks since she can't get a real job but she needs to make money somehow to feed Foofie, her poodle. This show would appeal to druggies, perverts and animal lovers. A demographic winner!! 30 men were picked to have sex with one woman! After the 30th man is done, the woman will pick who was the best and the winner will win 5 million dollars!! The only catch is, the woman is actually dead so she won't be able to pick a winner. Imagine the shock of all 30 men (well, we hope all 30) when they find out that they had sex with a corpse! A huge cable winner!!! I got a hell of a lot more ideas like those above, so if you're a TV executive and you want some definite rating winners, feel free to get ahold of me. Now it's that time again. My top ten movies of 2002. No hoity-toity bullshit costume/period dramas from me. Just movies I liked and you'll probably like too. If you don't, too bad. It's my list and I can do what I want with it. 10) "Harry Potter and the Curse of the Extruding Broomstick"----A little known, hard to find movie that features Harry getting brutally cornholed by an out of control broomstick. Killed of the franchise just like that. 9a) "Spider-Man"---The first half. 9b) "Star Wars: The Phantom Menace"'---The second half. 8) "Reign of Fire"---Hey, I liked it. 7) "The Bourne Identity"---Believe it or not, this was much better than the tv mini-series starring Richard Chamberlain. 6) "We Were Soldiers"---Excellent movie. 5) "Dog Soldiers"---Soldiers vs. werewolves plus a guy trying to stuff his intestines back into his body makes for some good, family friendly viewing. 4) "Orange County"---Two words: JACK BLACK. 3) "Die Another Day"---James Bond is back and he's got a really cool car again. Plus it has that topless chick from "Swordfish" too!! 2) "Insomnia"---Mork no longer has Mindy and takes it out on some unlucky girl. Scarface is now drug free but still can't sleep so he chases Mork around Alaska. 1) "The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers"---Okay, I haven't seen it yet, but I had "The Fellowship of the Ring" in last year's top 10 list before I saw that one too so live with it. And here's Bob's top 5 list so you can have even more choices (he recently got direct tv so he spent most the year watching all the estrogen channels; Lifetime, Oh, WE, and porn channels): 5) "The Power Puffs Movie" - Sugar, Spice, and Everything nice gets mixed with a bottle of Whoop-Ass. Later "Whoop-Ass" was replaced with "Agent X" you know, for the kids. 4) "DISASTER!!!" - A woman scientist struggles with her period while her coworkers try to prevent the destruction of the universe. 3) "CALL - ME!!!" - An urban fabulous princess tries to drop the hint that she wants another date. 2) "Thunderbirds Are Go!!!" - Not really a movie, but I love them crazy puppets. 1) "I was a barbecue rotisserie" - A delicate story of a woman's first threesome as she struggles with her period. COMING NEXT: Top 10 albums of 2002! Email Stephen! snide_remarks@theweirdcrap.com
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| | | | | | © 2002 by TheWeirdcrap.com - "Insanity has found a home." |
