|
|
|
| This Week's |  |
| | | | | | | Add To Your Site! . |
|
| Commentaries: |  |
|
|
Lunatic Ravings!
I promised that this week I would write something that makes sense and I promise to stick to my word. See, I found that sticking the tip of a cat's tail in your mouth causes the same high that a mixture of heroin/acid/household bleach/diesel fuel/marijuana/tequila does! And you can fly! I mean REALLY FLY! It all happened when I drifted off to sleep while watching "Happy Days" on TVLand. It was the touching episode where Richie and Lori Beth were getting ready to fuck in his car and he happened to look in the rearview mirror and saw that Arnold's was burning down. The fire department was called but it was too late. Total bummer. But the kicker was that it was all Chachi's fault since he was busy trying to fuck Joanie instead of watching the restaurant. As I was watching this pivotal episode, I was drifting in and out of sleep. During one of my mini-sleeps a cat jumped onto my chest and his tail popped into my open mouth. When I fully awoke I felt omnipotent, so I spit out the cat's tail, climbed onto the roof of my house and started flapping my arms. Soon I felt myself rising into the air. I must have blacked out because of the excitement I felt because when I came to, I found myself lying face down in the front yard. I know I was flying. I could feel it. But I didn't know how I could fly so I retraced my steps. Soon I came to the conclusion that it was the cat's tail so I walked around the house trying to find him. And find him I did, taking a dump in his litter box. I took a deep breath and went to the litter box and waited for him to finish. When he did, I picked him up and stuck his tail in my mouth for a few minutes. That did the trick. Again I felt omnipotent and this time I stood in the middle of the street waiting for a car to come along. I figured that I would purposely get hit by a car to show my neighbors how powerful I was. This would show them I wasn't someone to mess with and that they better stop calling the cops on me. I never got to get hit since I discovered that I was naked and that could cause myself a major headache especially since I live so close to a school so I hung my head in shame and went back inside to watch more tv. As I promised, this all made sense. COMING NEXT: Who is cafecutie21? Why has she pissed me off? What am I going to do about it? You'll see! Email Stephen! snide_remarks@theweirdcrap.com
|
|||||||||||||||||
|
|
||||||||||||||||||
|
| | | | | | © 2002 by TheWeirdcrap.com - "Insanity has found a home." |
