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Chick Shit - 10/08/03
By Hooty McBoobs
Published each Wednesday

IS Donnie Z. the true Messiah?


I know that its been some time since I have written, but I have been having some trouble at work - the trouble is that they make me work.

Here is some Hooty Mail to keep you entertained. Please be warned the following is very disturbing and may cause extreme anxiety and uncontrollable vomiting. Especially if you didn't know Bon Jovi was a Kebler Elf, or that Pete is Cleopatra Queen of "Denial":



Hooty,
I am writing this after reading your most recent article about the cat, the car, the fat man and the mean paramedic. In your expose you mentioned that you are/may be a messenger of God. I believe you are. While reading your column, I had an epifany of sorts and in light of the recent attacks on Iraqi bystanders by well meaning troops and Scchwwarzzenneggerrs attack on the citizens of the West Coast. I believe God touched me (Buddy, that wasn't God that was Father O'Brian - HM), through you, and gave me the following message to convey:

We are all God's children and I believe that all people of all religions be they Christen, Muslim, Hindu or Mexican should come together and worship the God or Phallic symbol or their choosing. We are all brothers and sisters on this planet and we should all go the park and fly kites and play with little innocent bunnies. We should all be running through the beautiful meadows nude, except for fig leafs over our most intimate of wee wees. I of course will have the largest of fig leafs. Perhaps Jesus, Mohammed and Buddha could play badminton or Chinese jump rope while we all cheer them on in all their glory.

Please tell Carol S. that Jon BonJovi is 5' 3" tall in real life.

Regards,
Donnie Z.

PS. Pete is DEFINATELY NOT a homo.


Next Week: Proof that Pete is a Mo! Or something else… who knows

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