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Song in my head:
"…ridin' high in April,
shot down in May…"
- Frank Sinatra -
Reader mail!!!
The following was sent by Brian who is currently traveling with a circus and has been in the live entertainment
industry for most of his life. I occasionally he likes to write about things he notices in an average day. He is
witness to a series of fucked up adventures he'd like to tell people about. The names are changed to protect the
innocent…
Elevator
Follies
So, I'm riding up in the elevator after my long haul to the liquor store and there's this couple.
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"...as if he was a dog checking the scent or something, but I kept my shit
to myself." |
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At first, when I stepped in I thought to myself, now there's a happy normal couple, which is sometimes a relief
to see after daily fucked up episodes of "he said she said" inside the circus.
But that type of bullshit is expected in the entertainment industry, I've seen it a thousand times, and I blame
all of the fucked up relationships I see on a lack of options, but I may be wrong.
Anyway, I step in the elevator after the couple, and they took the side with the buttons, so I say "34 please",
and, "…man, it's a hell of a view from up here in downtown Boston."
The chick pushes the button, and I thank her, but the guy says "no problem".
Didn't think much of it, some chicks like their guys to speak for them, and this was a well groomed couple, no
doubt in fear that the un-kept bum next to them could at any moment start picking his nose or something.
So there I am, picking my nose, and the guy leans over like he's going to kiss his women on the neck or something,
not a sickening display of affection anymore by my standards, but instead, he smells her tits.
This shit cracked me up because it seemed perfectly normal to them, as if he was a dog checking the scent or something,
but I kept my shit to myself.
Then the fucker appears as if he's making a passionate move to brush her face with his hand, hell I do that shit,
chicks likes that shit, but instead he runs his keys along her cheek...and the fucking chick acts like she enjoyed
it.
I know what you're thinking, maybe she's just a whore or something, but honestly I'm telling you this was obviously
a "couple", and the dumb-fuck was just an idiot at interacting or something. I'd hate to see them in
the act of coitus, he'd probably slap the used rubber on her face and she'd just giggle and say "oh, sweetie".
Personnaly, if I was her, I'd take the bum in the corner picking his nose...at least she'd understand what she
was in for.
And there you have it, no matter how normal some folks seem, they're all freaks! Now you don't feel so bad about
visiting "TheWeirdcrap.com."
AND NOW YOU KNOW!
COMING NEXT:
My God I'm still from Texas!
Email
Bob!
webmaster@theweirdcrap.com
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