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Ask Bob:
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Ask Bob - 05/21/04
By Bob Senitram
Posted each Friday

Ask me a damn Question!!!

Song in my head:
"So I got me a pen and a paper, and made up my own little sign,
it said, 'Thank you lord for thinkin' 'bout me, I'm alive an' doin' fine..."
- The Five Man Electrical Band -

Last week I mentioned that Kerry decided to get Warren Buffet on his team to head the finances of the country when he's elected. I guess that would be ok, 'cause officially he's a new money rich man, which is different from and old money rich man. New money folks want the economy to be good, but old money actually profit if the economy is bad...I know it sounds crazy...I'll explain some other time, you'll just have to believe me for now.

He's a cheap, that I know. That could be good for the economy, because the US has been spending money we don't have all willy-nilly like for that last four years, now we're broke. Kinda crazy if you think about it...a spend crazy republican president vs. a spend thrifty democrat.

I'm sure it's snowing in hell right now.

Why I know Warren Buffet is a cheap skate, by Bob Senitram:
When I was a youngster I used to live a few blocks away from him on Farnam Street, (in Omaha, NE). One day I thought, "Wow, it sure would be nice to have a couple of shares of his fancy-smancy stock.

So I got me a pen and a paper, and made up my own little sign. It said, "
WILL WORK FOR STOCK."

I was specific to put a period at the end of the sentence so he didn't think I was a dummy.

I nailed the sign to a piece of wood and got to work. I went out to Farnam Street bright and early at 11:00 am in the morning and held up my sign high for all to see. But I never saw him drive by. The next day I tried it again, but no luck.

I became convinced he was taking an alternate way to work just to avoid me, so I go out from 5pm to 5:30 pm, and try to catch him on his way home. I figure he'd see me for sure, hire me mow his lawn or something, and I'd get a few shares. Still no luck.

I did this all summer long, one day I got up super-early and 9 am! Still, the cheap bastard never stopped! Now I hear some of his prime stock is worth thousands of dollars each...damn, if only he weren't such a cheap bastard.

I even got a splinter from the sign, which later seemed to develop into a wart that I have to this very day...all for nothing.

Or was it?

After 35 years my scientific mind began to look at this wart from a different light...perhaps it wasn't all in vain...

And now you know!

Coming Next: WORT HOGS?

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