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Song in my head:
"Johnny my love get out of the business,
the odd are getting fatter by the minute."
- Liz Phair -
kawa asks,
I just don't understand how a garbage disposal works! I man all that waste, down the drain? How come it don't
clog up the drain? IT JUST DOESN'T MAKE SENSE!
cOnFuSeD...
Dear kawa,
Some things in this world are not meant to be understood.
Like why you said "I man" instead of "I mean."
Is it because subconsiously you want to make sure people know you are a male, because you were teased as a child
for your silly name? Did the kids call you Kawa-jelly.
But with a name like that, maybe your a girl, but want to be a man. Who knows? I don't. It don't make sense.
Like Stephen's last column. He asks
me why "The Alamo" did so bad at the box office? Then he only publishes half my answer. A sound bite
which misleads the public.
All through history white Americans applaud when folks with dark skin get killed. I think Disney counted on that
fact when they decided to film of the Alamo. They figured white folks would come in droves to see Mexicans get
shoot. But it didn't happen? Why?
Because watching dark skinned folks get shoot by white folks ain't good enough if the white folks don't win. At
the time of the Alamo, Texas was part of Mexico. It was not Mexico attacking America, it was a bunch of Texans
stageing a very poor revolutiion. And just like the U.S. in the Civil War, Mexico sent troops to stop the revolution.
After the Texan's lost, America came to the conclusion that white folks are the same as Americans and Mexico attacked
American Citizens, thus, had to retaliate. Which they did.
However, since Mexico granted automatic citizenship to anyone who purchased land in Mexico, all the folks there,
no matter where they came from, were, at that time Mexicans. The revolution in Texas only goes to show what happened
when Mexicans were nice to the white folks.
Then after the U.S. stepped in, they took the land from Mexicans without monetary compensation and sold it to the
white folks. However, a later President felt guilty about doing that and actually paid the Mexican Government
for the land that was taken, so all was forgiven and Mexico has been our friends ever since.
Even when Hitler offered to give New Mexico, Texas, and Arizona back to Mexico if they let him set up camp south
of the border, they said, "No thank you." Hitler wanted to attack the U.S. from the South while Japan
attacked from the West. Kind of a "double whammy." Had Mexico decided to act like the Texans, the
extra resources neede to protect our Southern border could have turned the tide of World War II. But lucky for
us and Europe, Mexico said no.
See? You can make a mistake, but if you just admit the error, the outcome is way better than if you just pretend
like it never happened.
So when "ye-ha" Texans shout, "Remember the Alamo!" What they're really saying is, "We're
stupid arrogant people who can't be trusted."
It seems like a history lesson may have nothing to do with current events, but I think it helps us understand how
the simple Texan mind works. Which in turn helps us understand why George Bush has made some of the decisions
he has made, and why ultimately it will take a more intelligent person to enhance the economy, get our schools
back in order, and help resolve the issues in the Middle East.
All which further goes to prove that Stephen is nose-picking jack-ass.
LONG LIVE THE WHITE STRIPES!!!
And now you know!
Coming Next: The
Return of Super Fly!
Ask Bob a Question!
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