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Ask Bob!
Ask Bob! - 05/25/02
By Bob Senitram
Published each Friday
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New and Improved
disclaimer from the Editor:
Last week Bob gave medical advice. Our lawyers have advised us that we need to urge readers not to follow the medical
advice given by Bob. He is not a medical professional, nor is he knowledgeable of medicine. In fact he is not an
electrician, a plumber, carpenter, historian, nor has he invented a time machine.
Bob does not glow in the dark.
We can't think of anything that Bob has expert knowledge of. Most of anything he says is either the result of hallucinations
or is a bold face lie.
Bob is not edible -
unless slowly cooked over an open flame sprinkled with lemon pepper and served with a green beans and potato salad.
Do not taunt Bob with email, it only encourages him.
Do not leave Bob in water.
If left in water, Bob may explode in a heat less flash of light that will leave
all organisms, within a 5 mile radius, blind for approximately 7.5 hours.
If Bob does not explode, his molecules may dissipate into an odorless gas that will repel mosquitoes.
Please keep these tidbits of information in mind when reading his commentaries.
Thank You:
The Staff and Management of TheWeirdcrap.com.
I was going to make my grand announcement of the new addition to the Senitram residence!
A 10 LB BABY GIRL!!!
But the big surprise was ruined by Melissa Paternick when she beat me to the punch and announced the birth of our
baby in her Wednesday column. She also claims to be the mother...I'll address her pack of lies from last weeks
commentary, but first I need to address something else.
For some reason, I am convinced that the entire staff and management of TheWeirdcrap.com has turned against me. In a heated
debate last week, they tried to convince me to "tone down" my commentaries. Especially if discussing
politics or world events. I refused and they threatened censorship of my commentaries and even the possibility
of taking my commentaries off TheWeirdcrap.com.
I couldn't believe this! I've been with them through thick and thin! Now they want to shut me up!
I suspect the real reason
that they are trying to silence me is...
Dear Readers,
Due to the new word limit of our weekly commentaries, the entire "Ask Bob" commentary could not fit in
this weeks page.
Thank You:
The Staff and Management (white shirts)
And now you know!
COMING NEXT TIME: Will there
be a next time?
Email Bob!
webmaster@theweirdcrap.com
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