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 Bob Sez - 8/31/01
By Bob Senitram
Published each Friday
I'm feeling much better this week.
You might have noticed that the "Lunatic Ravings" commentary has a name of an album followed by the artist.
Stephen just wants you to know what's in his head.
So I thought I would do the same thing. Only I'm going to call it, "The Song in My Head." This will be
a lyric from a song I like or don't like. Either way, it's something that's stuck in my head. Later, scientists
can correlate the music in my head with the themes of the commentaries and come to some conclusion about this or
that…blah, blah, blah.
Song In My Head:
"…said, I'd have the rent next Friday.
So next Friday come, and I didn't have the rent, and out the door I went."
- John Lee Hooker -
Now down to business…
Someone at work asked how I liked that Nebraska game. I didn't watch it. I didn't even know when it was on TV.
One thing I forgot about Omaha, is folks down here love to watch that "Big Red Football." Paint something
red and folks down here will follow it anywhere.
I always thought of sports as a form of exercise. Since exercise only benefits the person doing it, it seems stupid
to watch someone exercise. I never get excited and jump and scream when I watch any sporting event, because I just
don't give a rat's ass who wins. I really don't understand why other people care. If I wanted to watch a bunch
of men prancing around patting each other on their rear ends, I'll just watch an episode of "Will and Grace."
At least that only lasts a half hour.
I quite sure the whole American sports thing is a natural development of society to pacify "yahoo's,"
so they don't cause too much trouble. I'm sure once evolution kicks in, the general public will no longer have
a need for all this competitive sports brooo-ha-ha.
But until then, I guess it's better to have the simple minded get excited over a safe televised event a couple
of times per week, otherwise; who knows what kind of trouble they would get into if they wandered around outside.
Speaking of TV, between news stories the reporters around here seem to like to joke around, and chit and chat,
and sit down and chat. Now, last week, they proceed with thier pitter-patter, when the camera pulled back the female
newscaster was trimming a fingernail. She looked up and quietly covered the clippers with one hand and just kept
doing the news.
It just seemed really funny - to me.
Speaking of me, I've been working at an Inbound Telemarketing company. And for no particular reason, I decided
to clear my throat real loud every time the person talked. I kept doing this until they hung up. It was so fun
I did it to the next caller.
Then I did it again.
It took them 45 minutes to fire me.
Which gave me more time to watch TV. Which is alright with me.
Speaking of TV, I'm watching the news again and they are interviewing a guy from Florida beaches. The lady said,
"Since you have signs up that tell people not to swim because of sharks, is there some kind of penalty if
they ignore the signs?"
The guy from Florida says, "Well, they might get bit by a shark."
Again I think this is funny. Speaking of funny, I'm tired of writing and I'm gonna look at some comics.
NEXT WEEK: Job hunting and pee-pee on my
pants.
webmaster@weirdcrap.every1.net
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